


Moss And The Irishman

by Chaddydaddy



Category: IT Crowd
Genre: British, British Comedy, Cute, Domestic Fluff, Drama, Drama & Romance, Fanfiction, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Gay, Homosexuality, I Will Go Down With This Ship, Light Dom/sub, M/M, Male Homosexuality, Relationship(s), Romance, Sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-13
Updated: 2020-04-20
Packaged: 2021-03-02 04:21:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 9,308
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23629162
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chaddydaddy/pseuds/Chaddydaddy
Summary: Moss and Roy have a habit. This habit includes hooking up instead of discussing feelings, and a lot of hiding who they are. But one day, Moss forces Roy to face the truth.Posted here from my Wattpad.
Relationships: Maurice Moss/Roy Trenneman
Comments: 21
Kudos: 37





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> My Wattpad is @gayphister I have a bad education and an IT crowd fanfiction

The calmingly rhythmic sound of my own white sneakers hitting the tiles as I bounced my way from the elevator to my office alerted the rest of my team of my whereabouts.

My team, of course, consisted of my best friend in the whole world, Roy (who some refer to as an a-hole, but I prefer misunderstood), and the pathological liar, yet somehow 'relationship manager', Jen.

As I approached the office, an argument between, ironically, the relationship manager and my best friend seemed to come to an abrupt halt. I stood patiently at the door between the elevator to our basement and my shared office with Roy, as the two turned around and gave me a fake smile.

"Welcome back to the office, Maurice," Roy gestured towards me and seemingly did his best to act calm.

On most people, I wouldn't recognise the sudden change in demeanour, but as I've spent about the past ten years talking to Roy and only Roy, I not only noticed that, but the fact that, for whatever reason, his hair was straight today.

"Thank you," I figured receiving a welcome was well deserved as I did tend to do a lot of the work, so I shrugged it off and continued with my usual daily rituals.

"Hello, Jen!" I smiled innocently as I removed my coat and backpack.

"Moss," her voice was inquisitive as she shuffled her way over to me, causing Roy to groan from where he was now slouching at his desk.

"Yes?" I smiled up at her after quickly logging into my computer.

"Do you notice anything different about me today?" My boss perched herself atop my desk and seemingly tried to sit up so straight, she would break her back.

I wracked my brain for about ten seconds whilst looking her up and down, and all I could come up with was;

"Well, you are sitting in a rather odd position. Are you sure that's comfortable? I could refer you to a good chiropractor if you need one," I leaned my arms on the desk and shrugged slightly.

Jen began to sit normally again before nodding her head to Roy, "Notice anything different about roy, then?"

I felt my smile grow slightly as I swivelled my chair to fixate on Roy. That I did know!

"Roy's hair has been straightened," I looked back at Jen, my teeth showing, awaiting approval.

"See!" Jen yelled accusingly and pointed at Roy and I, "You two never focus on me or notice anything about me!"

Roy rolled his eyes in protest, "Moss and I have just known each other for longer, of course we notice you!"

I shrugged and nodded along with Roy's explanation. I was convinced Roy would be my best buddy forever, and you must back your best buds.

"How long have you guys known each other for?" Jen raised an eyebrow.

"Around ten years," I replied.

"And you two, in that long, have only made out once?" She laughed a little as Roy's facial expression dropped.

"Well, it was one lot of kissing, over what I would call two segments, so I suppose it depends-" My thorough explanation was cut off boy Roy's, unfairly, annoyed voice.

"You told her about that!?" Roy's voice raised in a way that frightened me and he flailed his arms in confusion and annoyance.

"Well, yes-" I took a second to figure out how to word this, "It didnt exactly mean anything."

"Either way," Jen broke the incredibly awkward silence that had seemed to drag it's way around the room, "Didn't you guys ever experiment when you were young and drunk?"

Roy and I shot each other a worried glance. I was a very open person and honestly wouldn't mind telling Jen that much, but Roy...

-

_I pulled my_ _pants_ _back on,_ _being_ _sure_ _it_ _took me five_ _seconds_ _to pull on each respective pant leg. Roy sat at the side_ _of_ _the bed, head in his hands._

_"Moss,_ _what_ _did we just do?" I heard a crack in Roy's voice that_ _I_ _had not heard_ _before_ _that_ _day._

_"Well, Roy,_ _I_ _believe that is_ _what_ _people_ _call_ _sexua-"_

_"No, Moss,"_ _I_ _watched_ _Roy's face grow redder and_ _heard_ _his voice shake._

 _I_ _didn't_ _know my best friend back_ _then_ _as well as_ _I_ _do now, but_ _I_ _certainly_ _knew that_ _something_ _was wrong._

_"Well, it_ _definitely_ _was,"_ _I_ _then began_ _to_ _pull my_ _shirt_ _on and do the buttons up again, counting the amount of buttons as_ _usual_ _._

_I heard a slight_ _whimper_ _from where Roy_ _sat_ _._ _I'd_ _never seen him cry_ _before_ _then._ _I'd_ _never even felt_ _hurt_ _for someone I'd_ _loved_ _before._

_I_ _sat_ _down next to him and rested a hand on his_ _back_ _in an_ _attempt_ _to calm_ _down_ _my best friend, but he flinched and scooted away._

_"_ _We're_ _not_ _gay, Moss," he said quietly but_ _firmly_ _,_ _refusing_ _to_ _make_ _eye_ _contact_ _with_ _me._

_"Roy, I-"_ _I_ _might as well have_ _cut_ _myself off._

_I had no clue what to say._

_"_ _We're_ _not_ _gay_ _!"_ _His_ _voice grew louder._

_That angry yell that still frightened me to this day._

_"Do friends-"_ _I_ _looked down, "Do friends_ _do_ _what we just_ _did_ _?"_

_-_

It wasn't like I could lie to Jen myself. Not convincingly, at least. I shot Roy a pleading glance.

"Nope, I've always known that tits are the only things for me, Jen," Roy explained, almost convincingly.

I nodded profusely, doing my best not to sweat but only really making it worse, before going back to my laptop and pretending nothing had happened.

Jen rolled her eyes and made her way back into her own office. I glanced at Roy again, but he had just gone back to slouching over Roonscape.

Maybe he'd never come around...

Or out.


	2. Do You Know What Love Feels Like?

I checked the time on my laptop with a serious expression spread across my face.

12:58.

Two minutes. In two minutes, I would speak to Roy. Speak to Roy about something we hadn't spoken about in around nine years. But, it was fine. Speaking was not the problem in itself. In fact, I've been told I possess the ability to ramble about nothing, forever. I guess it isn't possible to ramble about nothing, it has to be about something.

12:59

Talking was the easy part. The subject matter on the other hand, was the one thing that had held enough power to ruin the one constant in my life; my best buddy Roy. It was the one thing that had loomed over both of our heads, especially Trenneman's, for the past nine years.

1:00

And I was sick of it having so much bloomin' power.

"I'm taking my break!" Jen sang out across the office.

"Bye, Jen!" Roy called back from our store room.

"B-bye Jen," I sighed a little as I watched her leave the room and took a puff of my handy asthma puffer to slightly relieve my breathing.

"You okay, Moss?" Roy asked me non-chalantly, leaning on the door frame of our store room, stirring a coffee.

"Well, Roy," I swiveled my chair around and adjusted my glasses in an attempt to maintain my composure, "I believe we should talk. Because we don't have serious talks often enough."

Roy rolled his eyes and took a swig of coffee, "How many times do I have to tell you I did not have sex with her just because she reminded me of my mum?"

"Oh, Roy, and I do not say this lightly, shut up!" I stood up and clenched my fists, doing my best impression of scary people I'd seen on the telly.

Roy let out an overdramatic gasp. One that I honestly still cannot place as sarcasm or serious. Either way, it rendered me flippin' annoyed.

"Roy Trenneman, you listen to me right now!" I hissed, and my best friend did as he was told, standing up as straight as possible for a man with his multitude of back problems.

"We have ignored that first night for nine ruddy years now and we have ignored what happened the week after for eight years and 51 mother-flippin' weeks!" I continued to whisper-yell, "And we have ignored what happened one year after that for seven years and 51 ruddy weeks!"

Roy's usual dismissive expression faded into one of shock. Memories of Moss and Roy, young and free, years ago seemed to flash before him for the second time that day.

"Look, can we-" Roy placed down his coffee cup and moved closer to me, so I instinctively stepped back.

"I am not giving you any flipping sympathy!" I folded my arms, almost a spitting image of my mother (something I hated to be, but needed to do), "Every time I try and ruddy mother-loving flipping talk this out with you, we end up having intercourse, and then you don't talk to me for a week! Why do you think I stopped!?"

I think Roy somehow detected the hurt on my face and stepped back until he bumped into his desk, and seated himself on it.

"I don't-"

"You don't love me, I know!" I threw my hands in the air, something I don't believe I'd ever done before then, "But, Roy, I know for a fact that I'm not the only one of us who enjoyed those times..."

I sighed and took a seat, lowering my voice, "If you can't admit it to me, admit it to yourself, Roy."

-

 _"Did_ _you_ _get a Valentine's Day date, at least?" I sat on my best friend's couch, ignoring the movie_ _playing_ _on_ _his TV, and_ _directing_ _all my attention towards him, as_ _I_ _often did._

_"Uhh... no," he sighed and took a large gulp of alcohol, "What about that girl on seventh who liked you?"_

_I faced my milk bottoms-up and shook my head in an attempt to look_ _like_ _a 'real man', "Ruddy women!"_

_I_ _didn't_ _really_ _lik-_

 _"You_ _didn't_ _really_ _like her,_ _did_ _you?" Roy gave me_ _an_ _almost_ _teacher like 'tell me the_ _truth_ _' look._

 _I sighed and shook my head._ _He_ _knew me too well,_ _before_ _I_ _even_ _knew_ _him_ _too_ _well_ _. I never quite_ _understood_ _how he_ _got_ _me so quickly._

 _"Why_ _didn't_ _you_ _just tell me the_ _truth_ _, Moss?" He_ _playfully_ _punched my shoulder._

 _I looked_ _him_ _up_ _and_ _down_ _._

 _"_ _I've_ _never been quite_ _sure_ _what_ _love feels_ _like_ _,"_ _I_ _said frankly, "Do you know?"_

 _"Honestly, Moss," Roy_ _sighed_ _and trailed off slightly before_ _bringing_ _himself_ _back_ _to the room, "_ _I_ _think_ _I'm_ _only_ _just_ _starting_ _to learn."_

 _"How so?" I tilted my head in_ confusion _and stared down my best_ _friend_ _._

 _He seemed to almost_ _pounce_ _on me. My heart raced as_ _I_ _began to slouch under_ _him_ _. I let myself kiss him back, and_ _wrapped_ _my arms_ _around_ _his soft_ _body_ _. Maybe that was love. Maybe_ _that's_ _what_ _he was_ _attempting_ _to_ _show me._

_That_ _was the_ _first_ _time our_ _lips_ _ever touched, and it was something I, myself, could only describe as_ _wondrous_ _._

_"Shall we take this to my bed, then?" Roy pulled away_ _for_ _a split second and_ _I_ _could_ _do nothing but nod_ _in_ _agreement_ _._

_-_

I sat in his lap, my hands rustling through his hair as our lips and tongues followed each other in a way that felt natural, but passionate.

"How- did it- get to this," I pulled away but kept my place securely in his lap, holding onto his shoulders, "Again?"

I watched Roy's eyes swell with tears and took this as a signal to stand up and stop acting like I was a twenty year old, young and in love, wind in my hair, milk in my stoma-

"I'm sorry, Moss," Roy sat up for the first time in a while.

I shook my head and picked up my trusty backpack and coat before running away, something I was prone to doing in uncomfortable situations.

Ruddy men.


	3. He's Not Gay

"One crack, two crack three crack, four crack, door," I mumbled to myself.

I had started counting with four cracks until the door. Even, good luck. I shut my eyes and wished in my head that today my best buddy would have returned. However, as I strode in, wide eyed and ready to seize the say, I saw that Roy was nowhere to be found.

I clenched my fists before carelessly tossing my backpack to the wind- or just across the room. I then stormed into my boss' office and threw myself onto the cushioned seat in front of her desk.

"Aw Moss, are you okay?" She looked over to me from her computer (which was not plugged in, may I add) with a look on her face that seemed to be worried, "I know it's serious because you haven't taken your coat off."

I sighed angrily and folded my arms.

"You're our relationship manager," I didn't look her in the eye, "What does love feel like?"

"Does this have something to do with why Roy isn't showing up?" she leant on the desk and pointed a finger towards me, "You know, I always suspected you were-"

"Just shut it and answer!" I furrowed my eyebrows in a way that I could only describe as ferocious, but Jen didn't seem incredibly scared.

Instead she rolled her eyes slightly and decided to answer.

"Well, when I'm in love I always want to be near that person."

Check.

"And I always want to remind them just how much I love them."

Check.

"And I can't help but wonder how they're feeling or what they're doing at this moment."

Check.

"Of course there's more to it, but that's just an idea," she did her best to catch my eye, "What's this about?"

I pouted and ignored her, "And... if two people... keep rutting around together, even though they keep saying they'll stop, is that love?"

"Oh my god..." Jen yelled, her voice becoming more high pitched, "OH MY GOD! MOSS, I JUST FIGURED IT OUT?"

"Figured what out, Jen?" I shrugged, deciding to entertain her, usually odd, thoughts.

"YOU AND ROY ARE GAY! AND I'M SMARTER THAN I THOUGHT I WAS!" She didn't seem to give any clue as to whether she was accepting or not, just excitement at her figuring out what I guess was a mystery to her.

But, for once, she was right.

"Well, that's the thing, Jen, we're not gay," I clarified.

She snorted, which I found rather rude.

"I'm assuming 'rutting' is your word for sex," she gestured in a way that some might see as professional, had she not been very obviously stifling laughter.

"Well, yes, but, Roy insists he isn't gay," I nodded as an indication for her to go on with the correct facts.

She continued to laugh, "I'm sorry, and he gave me shit for going to that gay musical?"

"But that's the thing," I was beginning to get annoyed at Jen's relentless ignoring of what I was telling her.

"Moss, honey, your adorable lack of awareness leaves you open to be played with," would have been a great thing for Jen to say, were she not still giggling to herself.

"Roy is very obviously confused and, by accident or on purpose, is toying with you. So, I believe Roy is," she paused to snort with laughter, "Gay, but very confused."

I stood up and folded my arms once again, "I've had just about enough of this! Did you ever stop to think that maybe the reason Roy is afraid is because of people like you?"

I stormed, in a way that I believed to be triumphant, out of the office, being sure to pick up my back pack as I left. However, while on my way to Roy's house to be sure he wasn't dead, I got a message.

BestBud❤: are there an even amount of buttons on your clothes today

Mossy Boy: You haven't messaged me in six days, twenty hours and five minutes and THAT is the first thing you message me?

BestBud❤: just answer

Mossy Boy: Yes, there are an even amount of buttons on my attire today.

BestBud❤: lucky right?

Mossy Boy: Yes.

BestBud❤: lucky enough to come over and lose against me at mario kart?

Mossy Boy: ONE round.

I put my phone into my jacket pocket. We could play one round, and then talk about this.

"Deep breaths, Maurice."

-

 _ToyRoy: how many_ _cracks_ _have you walked_ _over_ _today_

_Moss(sad face): Doesn't_ _matter_ _._

_ToyRoy: im sorry okay_

_Moss(sad face): It's_ _been_ _a week and you_ _didn't_ _bother to_ _contact_ _me._ _That's_ _rude, Roy._

_ToyRoy: can we just forget that happened? pizza and_ _whatever_ _film_ _you_ _like at_ _mine_ _tonight_

_Moss(sad face): Fine, but if you do this_ _again_ _,_ _I'm_ _going_ _to_ _be very perturbed._

_ToyRoy: it wont happen again_

_-_

_"_ I totally beat you!" I yelled at Roy with a smile spread all over my face.

I had my best friend back.

"I let you!" Roy seemed slightly more serious, which was, if I'm completely honest, cute.

Roy's phone buzzed and I jumped a little, startled to remember that life was a real thing and I couldn't just pick on Roy all day.

"Is it Jen? I stormed out earlier," I raised an eyebrow as Roy checked the notification.

"Oh, nothing, just my uh-" he paused and I watched his eyes scan the room, "Peach salesman?"

My heart began to pound and I felt my chest tighten.  
'One, two, three, four,' I counted over and over in my head.   
I had only just gotten my best friend back and he was hiding things from me. In a split second decision, I snatched the phone from his hand.

Bernard(smiley face): Great night last night, can't believe you've never had a boyfriend!

I dropped my friend's phone onto the lounge and looked up so that tears wouldn't come out. I didn't cry often.

"Roy, I thought you'd at least have the decency to tell me when you came out, or tell me you were finding new people-"

"Moss, I'm just confused," Roy held my face in his hands and directed my eyes towards his, "You're the only man I've ever... you know. And that's terrifying. And I hate myself every day for having the feelings that I do. I just need time."

I grabbed his arms and pulled his hands away from my face.

"And then what? Some switch is magically going to flip once you've rutted enough guys to know it's not just a phase? And then you'll run into my arms? Or, until you've had enough guys that you're sure there's better out there than me? At least be honest with me!"

Roy leaned in, but instead of kissing me this time, he hugged me. It was odd, but warm? I'd never really been hugged, if I'm honest. It was always intercourse with Roy, my mum was mean and strict, and I'd never had a real romance. I hugged back, tightly. I knew I shouldn't have, but something about him was so calming to me.

"Please," Roy's voice shook in my ear, "Moss, I'm so scared. I'm scared of myself, and that's something I never thought I would feel. Just, please, you're all I have. Let me have you."


	4. Time Lapse

I woke up warm. Everything felt soft. Unusual for me; I normally kept my bedroom cold.

 _I_ _woke_ _up cold._ _Unusual_ _for me;_ _I_ _normally_ _kept my bedroom warm._

But why did my sheets feel like skin? He'd done it again, hadn't he?

_But why did_ _I_ _feel another presence? We'd done it again, hadn't we?_

I yawned and opened my eyes slowly, before scanning the room.

Empty milk carton.

_Empty_ _beer_ _bottles_ _._

Soft skin protected me, it's arms wrapped around my body.

_I was alone in a bed that was not mine,_ _but_ _was_ _familiar_ _. I sat up to_ _see_ _Roy_ _pulling_ _his clothes back on._

I was naked, something very unusual for me. But there was only one person I was usually naked with. Surely enough, to my right, a sleepy Roy had his arms wrapped around me, his breathing was soft and steady.

'One two three four, one two three four.'

It would be okay, I just needed to leave without arousing suspicion. I managed to peel myself away from Roy without waking him up and quickly pulled my clothing back on.

My phone was buzzing like mad.

JennyWenny: I was just in shock you know I didnt mean it

JennyWenny: I dont know what you two are doing but get your asses to work

"Roy!" I managed to force myself to shout across the room to my best friend who layed on the bed, seemingly in his own world, "Roy!"

He jolted upward and locked eyes with me as a look of shame spread across his face.

"Never mind talking right now, just get your clothes on and get to work," being forceful had never really been my thing, but in all matters of Roy, it came more naturally.

Roy only managed to nod and stand up as I threw on my backpack and plodded my way to the door.

"Moss?" I paused but refused to turn around, knowing whatever he said would be much more difficult to be mad about if I saw his face, "I really do want to talk about this. Tonight, meet me at the pub near work. Public place, so no funny business."

Finally, something that made sense. I didn't particularly feel in the mood to talk now, however. So I threw up a thumbs up and bit my lip before marching out of the door.

-

_"Roy, we_ _said_ _that-"_

_"I_ _know_ _. But that's okay_ _because_ _as_ _far_ _as_ _I'm_ _concerned_ _, this_ _didn't_ _happen."_

_And then we_ _didn't_ _talk about it again. Of course_ _I_ _tried almost a year later, but..._


	5. Memories

_"Do you_ _remember_ _that time you_ _and_ _that girl_ _on_ _seventh_ _went on a date and_ _I_ _came_ _along because you were too awkward?" Roy turned to me, beer in_ _hand_ _,_ _obviously_ _bored with whatever was on the telly._

 _This simple_ _question_ _, however,_ _resulted_ _in a chain reaction. It began with me, of course, remembering 'that time'. I then continued to remember_ _things_ _. Going forward only a few days from 'that time', Roy_ _and_ _I_ _had been making out on this_ _exact_ _lounge._

 _I assume_ _I_ _didn't_ _respond_ _for_ _a few_ _minutes_ _, because_ _when_ _I_ _came_ _to from my memory, Roy was_ _snapping_ _his fingers in front of_ _my_ _eyes_ _. I blinked and_ _realised_ _Roy's gaze still firmly fixated_ _on_ _my face._

 _"Yes, Roy,_ _I_ _do remember that," I paused slightly to figure out how to bring our love-making up, "In_ _fact_ _,_ _I_ _remember_ _a time a week after_ _that_ _."_

 _Roy began to chug_ _his_ _beer_ _down_ _,_ _finishing_ _it all in seven seconds;_ _I_ _was_ _counting_ _. An_ _unlucky_ _number_ _._

 _"Roy, I-"_ _I_ _was interrupted in a fashion_ _that_ _seemed_ _to_ _be_ _becoming rather common._

 _His lips were so small, 20mm? His_ _tongue_ _was coated lightly with his oddly_ _familiar_ _saliva. It was soft, but bumpy. This was a_ _mistake_ _, but_ _it_ _was where I felt_ _most_ _comfortable_ _._

_-_

The sleeves of my puffy jacket were pulled tightly between my thumb and forefinger as I counted to a safe number in my head.

'1-2-3-4, 1-2-3-4.'

The pub wasn't particularly crowded, but between my anxieties surrounding my situation with Roy and the loud, crowded room, I was not handling incredibly well.

The room seemed to spin around me and I could feel drops of sweat forming on my forehead. I quickly placed a hand on the bar in order to keep myself upright.

"You alright, Moss?" Roy was snapping his fingers in my face, as he had all those years ago.

"I'm fine, Roy, just get this over with," I attempted to sound triumphant, but even I could tell my words were not being received before I saw the expression on Roy's face.

"Come on, Moss," Roy gently took hold of my wrist and used himself to create a pathway to the door for me to safely exit the premises.

Once outside, I sighed and stared at Roy's feet, and then mine. I was unsure of what to say, and I thought Roy felt the same. Until he quickly grabbed my arm, causing me to flinch. He looked apologetic, until his face lit up.

"I have somewhere I'd like to take you."

// **short chapter** **oopsie** **but** **I** **already** **know** **where** **this is** **going** **hehehehehehhrhehehehehehe**


	6. The End Of An Era

_"_ _I'm_ _sorry, okay!? Just, please. I need you."_

_"Roy,_ _I_ _could_ _never_ _lose you from my life. But this is it. Never_ _again_ _. This entire situation is ludicrous."_

_My_ _best_ _friend was_ _trying_ _to_ _appear_ _serious, but_ _I_ _knew_ _him_ _incredibly_ _well at that point. He was just excited to have not lost my friendship._

_-_

"Roy, why on earth are you taking me to work?" at this point, Roy's hand was firmly attached to mine and we were less than a street away from Reynholm Industries.

"Oh, but we're not working, Moss," Roy's thick Irish accent only made him sound more cheeky.

A large grin was spread across my buddy's face and he appeared the happiest I'd seen him since, " _Roy,_ _I_ _could never lose you from my life."_

And yet, he seemed even happier than that time. Or perhaps excited was a more appropriate assessment. I slowly let myself relax, just slightly. Seeing Roy this excited, it couldn't be that anything too bad was about to happen. I let a grin slip from myself, as well. What could be the harm?

We made our way to the main entrance of Reynholm Industries and Roy's hand let go of mine. I was disappointed, but soon realised that he had done so, so that he could begin rummaging through a side-bag that he had been keeping on his person. I watched as he pulled out what looked like a key card and pressed it against a censor on the side of the door.

I stayed in a quiet confusion as Roy took my hand again and put his key card away.

Roy pushed the door open and quickly ran us over to a security system situated on the wall. He began to punch in a code, and I decided to speak up.

"One: is this illegal? Two: how did you get that code? Three: what in the world does that code do? Four: are we allowed to be here?" I stood entirely still with a straight face as I relayed my list of concerns to the, seemingly out of his ruddy mind, man currently holding my hand.

Roy simply laughed and shook his head in a very dismissive Roy fashion.

"Douglass accidentally emailed the code to me instead of Ross on the top floor. It stops the security system so we won't get caught," he explained, seemingly with a calm tone, despite the fact that what he just explained sounded incredibly incriminating.

"One: that sounded awfully illegal. Two: why was Douglass allowing Ross access to that code? Three: what the flip are we doing here!? F-" I was cut off at three; an unlucky number, but not as unlucky as seven.

"It's not illegal 'cause we're not gonna get caught," Roy said, oddly seriously, and placed a sympathetic hand on my cheek.

He then lead me to the elevator without allowing me a second thought and pressed the button for the top floor.

"But, Roy, I'm not sure I've ever been to the top floor without permission from one of the Mr Reynholms," I pleaded.

"And you've also never seen the view from the top floor at night," Roy's face seemed smug as he was proud of his 'big idea'.

I let a little smirk form across my lips. At least he'd put some thought into this. However, I still wasn't sure why we were here. Surely it wasn't just to see a view.

The elevator dinged and the doors smoothly opened, something unseen for basement-dwellers.

I almost forgot to step out as I realised the view that could be seen from the windows at the end of the room. However, Roy gave my hand a tug and I began to follow.

The windows were so clean that it felt as though there were none between us and London. Skyscrapers stood amongst a navy blue late night sky. Stars twinkled in contrast with the ambitious lights of the city.

The room sat in complete silence. I almost forgot where I was, until the silence was halted by a gentle Irish voice.

"Moss?" Roy looked directly at me and our eyes met as I turned to face him.

"Yes, Roy?" I asked expectantly.

"I'm gay," two words, so simple, yet so sharp.

Those two words had haunted this man for his entire life. And yet, here he stood, looking into my eyes, his hand firmly grasping mine.

I watched as tears filled my best friend's eyes, and mine followed suit. A rare thing it was for either of us to cry, let alone for us to cry together. This had been a difficult few weeks for both of us, and yet we'd come out stronger.

I let go of my friend's hand so that I could pull him into a tight hug. He wrapped his arms around my waist and I could feel him lean into me.

"I love you, Roy," I smiled, though crying seemed to strain my voice.

"Oh, thank fuck," he sighed, causing us both to chuckle.

There was a pause. It felt comfortable, but Roy was obviously considering what to say.

"I love you too, but," he pulled away, placing his hands on my shoulders, an action that worried me terribly, "I need to take things slow. No kissing in public or announcing things to the world. I want to be with you, but it's gonna take some time."

I smiled and nodded, "I can do that."

I then, on an impulse, I sat on the ground and crossed my legs as I gazed out at the view.

"What are you-" I grabbed my boyfriend's hand and pulled him down onto the ground next to me.

"It's pretty," I smiled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I might do an extra chapter or I might not, depends on if this gets any attention lol


	7. Ross

"This one's cute, i'n 'e?" Roy's face was playful and excited.

I was so glad I decided to bring him along. He really was glowing.

Roy's dainty fingers pointed towards a small nemo fish.

"Oh my god, Roy, he looks like Nemo!" I gasped in excitement and grabbed onto Roy's coat, "I need him!"

Roy's face seemed to light up, though I wasn't completely sure why. I then felt Roy's chest gently brush against mine and realised how close I had pulled him towards me. I cleared my throat and quickly let go; I didn't want to make Roy uncomfortable in public. He seemed unfazed, however.

"Are you sure your mam's okay with you gettin' a fish?" He continued to watch fish swim by in their tanks.

"I'm sure! Just one though," I smiled at the smallest nemo in the tank, the one I had already claimed and would be sure to specify to the shop owner that I wanted.

My boyfriend and I stepped out of the pet store as I grasped my new fish in his little receptacle. I cradled the bottom of the bag with one hand and held the top with another. Roy watched as I held the fish up to my glasses in order to get a good look. I gasped in excitement and Roy laughed.

"Let's get him home!" I yelled.

"Will your mam be there? She scares me," Roy grew slightly stiff.

I shook my head with a smile and skipped along the path.

The trip home was normally short, but it seemed to take forever that day. I kept going to hold Roy's hand or kiss him on the cheek, before realising that I was the only person who knew about him. Jen thought we'd just decided to be friends, he didn't have much contact with his parents and, when he did, it was all a front.

Once home, I unlocked the door and Roy immediately walked in and flopped onto the lounge. I smiled slightly and made my way over to flick his nose.

"Get up, lazy bones, we've got to put Ross in his tank!" I tugged at Roy's hand.

Roy sat up and tilted his head, "Why Ross?"

I stood tall and smirked triumphantly, "Good, isn't it? It's what Douglass always calls us!"

Roy just laughed and shook his head before allowing me to pull him up.

-

We watched Ross happily swim around his tank in my room. Though I must admit, I mainly watched Roy. I wished I could read his thoughts. What did he want? Could I hold his hand in public? Could I kiss him in private?

I stood up straight, an action that felt nice after leaning down to the tank for so long.

"Roy?" I questioned and he stood up as well, "We... we've never kissed."

There was a small pause in which the room was dead silent.

Roy eventually laughed slightly and gave me a look as though I'd lost my mind, "Well... we have."

"I mean... romantically," I clarified rather quietly, but Roy seemed to hear me.

I watched his face move from disbelievement, to thought, to realisation.

"I guess we haven't," he shrugged.

I had to admit, it was odd that we'd never kissed romantically. I mean, we'd had ruddy sex.

"But..." I did my best to muster up some courage, "I'm not at all sure if you'd want me to kiss you. Or if you'd want me to hold your hand, or if you'd want me to hug you. Or what of it I could do in public and what of it I couldn't."

Roy sighed and smiled sympathetically before walking over to me and placing his hands around my waist.

"I should be a little more clear, shouldn't I?" he asked, almost teasingly, and all I could do was nod silently.

Roy leant in and our lips touched. However, it didn't feel like it had all those times we'd kissed before; this kiss served a different purpose. It wasn't rough, it wasn't animalistic. It wasn't just for pleasure. This kiss brought us closer together. This kiss conveyed love. And it symbolised how done with hiding we truly were.

I layed my head on Roy's chest.

"Hold my hand in public," I heard him say and I looked up at him, in shock.

"Are you sure you're ready?"

He nodded and kissed me on the head, getting my curls slightly, "Kissing might take a little longer though."

I nodded and grasped onto him tightly, "Whatever it takes."

"I'm home, Moss!" My mother sang out across the house, undoubtedly ruining the moment, and I quickly stumbled away from Roy's embrace.

My boyfriend jokingly whimpered a little at the sound of my mum's voice and I gave him a little hit on the shoulder before walking over to the TV in my room and retrieving two controllers. Roy picked up what I was putting down.

"Ready for me to kick your arse?" He asked with a smirk.

"I was ruddy born ready!"

-

Roy and I had been playing for around two hours, and I was beginning to get fidgety. I mean, Roy was right there. Just sitting there. And we were dating. And we were playing video games?

"Roy..." I muttered rather quietly.

He didn't seem to hear me.

"Roy?" I spoke up slightly.

Without looking up from the game, Roy just responded with a, "Ya?"

I frowned slightly and decided to take action. I snatched the controller from Roy's hand and an annoyed expression spread across his face as he went to complain. Any complaints were swiftly halted, however, when I pulled myself into his lap and wrapped my arms around his neck, placing a delicate peck on his lips.

This seemed to rev Roy's engines and he leaned in again to continue the kiss. Roy somehow managed to flip us over, and was then on top of me, gently kissing my neck and jawline as I stifled noises, so as not to alert my mother.

After a small while of Roy kissing my neck, my lips longed for his again, and I pulled his head back up to mine. My hands began to slowly make their way around my boyfriend's torso. And as I was so caught up in playing tongue twister with Roy, I failed to hear my mother's yelling from the kitchen.

"You've got to listen go me, Moss! Do you want anything to-" the door flung open and my mother walked in on the one thing I would least want her to see.

My right hand was doing a good job of combing Roy's hair, as my left did it's best to reach his bum. Roy's mouth was exploring the lower half of my face as well as the upper half of my body, his left hand covering my mouth as his right hand felt along my stomach.

My eyes opened themselves in response to all of the racket, and as I saw my mum staring down at us in shock, I practically threw Roy off of me. He seemed to protest at first, but stopped once his eyes checked over the woman he feared the most giving him the death stare.

"I think we're good, Ms Moss," Roy didn't dare look her directly in the eye, instead giving her a slight nod with his 'uh oh' face.


	8. Mrs Trenneman

'12341234123412341234-'

Roy and I sat a seat apart, not daring to touch, as my, rather large and intimidating, mother stared us down. Roy and I both didn't dare say anything. 

"Roy," she turned her head to eye my boyfriend, completely expressionless, "What's your secret?"

Roy's face was oddly similar to what it was during the Judy-Julie incident. He stumbled as he spoke and was obviously holding back tears. 

"We- well, my biggest secret- is probably that I'm g-" he paused when my mother began to shake her head and closed her eyes as if she were both pitying and condemning him. 

"No, Roy," she seemed mad at first and I began to fidget ever so slightly, "I mean what's your secret to understanding Moss? I mean, Moss is my son. And I love him with everything I have. And yet, I've always been jealous of you. He came out to you first, he spends all his time with you, he never fails to understand you."

I felt a wave of extreme guilt wash over me. Had I really been neglecting my mother that intensely? I decided to stay quiet in anticipation for Roy's answer. 

"W- well," Roy looked over at me, "Moss makes me happy no matter what, so I never feel the need to pressure him."

"Are you implying that I pressure my son?" My mother retorted and Roy sat up straight

He looked like a child being caught stealing, "No, m-"

My mother began to laugh sadistically and smiled at Roy, "Thank you for making my son happy."

Roy and I both finally let our breath flow easily, and my boyfriend went back to his usual slouching. 

"However, if I catch you and my son doing anything inappropriate while I'm in the house, I will disown both of you," she pointed a finger towards Roy, and then towards me.

I think she was joking, but I'm honestly still not sure. 

"Now where were we?" Mum stood up and nodded her head, "Oh yeah, do you boys want anything to eat?"

"Chips please!" I smiled and held Roy's hand under the table.

Roy ended up deciding to stay over that night and we were warned that if anything 'nasty' happened, my mum would figure it out with her 'motherly senses'.

We layed in my bed, playing with each other's fingers and just looking at each other. Everything finally felt so at peace. I was happy with Roy and my mum wasn't angry and that was all that mattered to me. 

"Moss?" Roy's gaze remained fixed on mine. 

"Yeah?" I replied gently. 

"Today got me thinking," his hands stopped fidgeting with mine and instead began to grasp, "I want to tell my parents about you."

The fact that Roy seemed proud of me made me excited, but still, I didn't smile. I didn't want him to tell his parents just because he thought he had to. 

"Why?" I placed a hand on his cheek. 

"I want to be close with my parents. And I want them to understand my life."

I nodded my head and pecked Roy on the lips. 

"I'll be here every step of the way."

-

Roy and I sat, side by side. There were no chairs in between us this time, but we still dared not touch. Roy looked even more pale than usual, and any person with mediocre eyesight could notice the monstrous beads of sweat forming on my forehead. I sat up as straight as possible, and Roy seemed to slouch down even more, almost in shame. 

"Roy," I whispered and he looked over at me, "I believe in you."

He nodded slightly and looked back up.

"What made you want to have dinner with the family?" Mrs Trenneman placed a bowl of salad in the middle of the table to accompany the rest of our meal. 

"Uh," Roy looked over at me for reassurance and I nodded, "Can you both please sit down?" 

Mr and Mrs Trenneman both took their seats across from Roy and I.

"Why did you bring Moss if this is serious?" Roy's mother took a small swig of wine and began to dish out her meal. 

'1-2-3-4.'

"Please can you just stop for a second?" Roy sighed and his mother put her hands up. 

Roy rolled his eyes and I gave him a reassuring pat on the back, an action that took more courage than anything I'd ever done. 

"There's a part of myself I haven't shared with you, and I would like to," Roy didn't dare look his parents in the eyes. 

'1234.'

"I'm gay," his voice cracked and he wiped a tear from his eye. 

"So you brought your boyfriend here to tell us that you're gay? You could've at least had the decency to not bring two of you here," his mother's voice grew louder and Mr Trenneman stayed dead silent. 

"With all due respect, Mrs Trenneman," I began but was cut off. 

"I don't care what you have to say, quite frankly," Mrs Trenneman sat tall and proud, it's a wonder her son turned out the way he did, "Before you, our son was an entirely average boy."

"Mrs Trenneman, one cannot simply make someone g-" I felt my blood boiling. 

"Roy," Roy's dad broke his silence, "I never want to see you step foot in this house again. You've upset your mother and I can't stand for that."

I turned my head to Roy once again, but his crying had stopped. He simply hung his head low. 

"Would you like to leave, Roy?" I looked at the side of his head sympathetically and he simply stood up, made his way to the front door, took all of my coats, and opened the door.

Forgetting about Roy's parents watching us, I stood up and ran to the front door in order to follow him. I caught up with my boyfriend on the path outside of his parents' house. 

"We came all this way," his voice cracked and he finally let tears flow, "All the way to Ireland. Just to tell them this. And-"

Roy sniffled and I wrapped my arms around him tightly. 

"Let's find a hotel and go to bed," I said in his ear. 

I let go and he simply nodded and took my hand.

"I love you, Roy. No matter what, I'm here."


	9. Oddly Anticlimactic

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Getting close to the enddd

Roy and I didn't talk the entire walk to the nearest hotel. He was whiter than I was when I got my shots, and whenever I tried to talk to him, all I received was a listless shrug. Roy did irk me at times, but I'd never wanted him to resort to complete silence.

It was the coldest and most awkward I believe Roy and I had ever been towards each other. And it was the worst concoction of guilt, worry and sympathy I had ever felt.

Once in our room, I got changed into my pyjamas, as a sensible adult should before sleeping. However, Roy just plonked himself down on the bed without a word. He didn't close his eyes, he just stared up at the ceiling.

Once changed, I layed down next to him and stared up at the ceiling as well.

"What can I do?" I asked softly.

"I don't wanna talk about it," Roy's expression didn't change.

"You can't just bottle it up," I turned my head to face him.

"That's always what you say," Roy sat up and his voice grew louder, "That I have to be open about myself. But look where I bloody am now!"

I felt my heart shrivel in a way. That's the only way I know how to explain it. I'd never been scared of Roy, nor had I ever been scared of him ending our friendship, or relationship. But my heart seemed to think something was wrong.

I decdided to sit up as well, in order to seem serious.

"I just think it's more practical, in the long run I mean, to be open with the people around you," my hands moved somewhat as I talked, and I made my best attempt to stay calm.

'1, breath, 2, breath, three, breath, four, breath.'

"Well I'm not as sure as you. How could I be? You're so clueless! Everything goes over your head, how could you not just be okay with everything?" Roy stood up, but I seemed unable to move.

I felt as though I had shrunk into the covers of the hotel bed. Perhaps Roy wasn't considering his words, or perhaps this was really how he felt. Whichever one it was, he had never spoken to me like this. I wish I was offended, but mostly I was just let down. Roy was someone who had never put me down for my naïvety. Well, that I'd picked up on.

"Yeah? Well-" I paused between every word, still somehow raising my voice, "If you weren't such a stick in the mud, maybe we'd actually get somewhere in this relationship! And your apartment smells like a ruddy fish swam in some wee and then died!"

I added in that last burn just to really make it sink in for Roy. I believe it worked, because he just turned around and sat back down on the bed. I simply snickered and took a pillow and the only blanket off of the bed, so as to arrange myself a - rather small and uncomfortable - bed on the hotel's floor. Roy huffed and layed down on the remaining pillow.

-

Crickets chirped through the night. I wasn't sure if Roy was awake, but I sure couldn't sleep. Not with those ruddy crickets chirping. They possessed absolutely zero rhythm and their continued surviving was entirely unnessecary. Simply their existence was enough to keep me from ever sleep again.

With Roy though, it was different. He'd hold me close, and suddenly he was my rhythm. Crickets, my fear of the dark, my brain consistently enquiring about the meaning of life and the universe. It all didn't matter, because Roy gave it a reason.

I eventually came to the decision that I should climb back into bed next to Roy. Not because I missed him or anything like that. Just because I needed a proper sleep, and Roy probably needed a blanket.

The second my body indented the bed, Roy rolled over to face me. I realised then, that he was awake too. I wasn't entirely sure in the dark, but I think I saw tears in my boyfriend's eyes.

"I'm sorry," he whispered to me, "I know you don't handle fighting."

I simply nodded softly and buried my head into Roy's chest. It didn't matter.

"If anything, I should have been more understanding," I paused to consider the wording of my sentence, "You were correct; I can be a little clueless... in terms of what's the right time and what isn't. You've had the most difficult twenty-four hours of your life. And it's my job to support you."

At that, Roy lifted my head up and began to passionately kiss me. I reciprocated. Were we actually going to...?

We hadn't since we'd gotten together, and I didn't think we would, for a little while longer at least. Of course I missed it, but I wanted to be sure that our relationship wouldn't go back to just... that.

I think I knew then that it wouldn't, and that Roy undoubtedly loved me. But still, I wanted something more than this. It felt oddly anticlimactic.

"Roy, stop," I pulled away and my boyfriend let go of me, "I want our first time as a couple to be more special than this."

Roy nodded to convey his agreement and pulled me into his chest once again.

"I promise, you'll always have family if you're with me," I wrapped a hand around Roy's back and he kissed me on the forehead.

We fell asleep, the sound of crickets chirping failing to compete with the sound of our combined breathing.


	10. Our Kind Of Romance

"Uh, mum, could you please pass me the salt?" I mumbled slightly.

For whatever reason, breaking the silence felt even more awkward. My mother nodded slightly and passed it to me.

"Do- do you want some, Roy?" I didn't look my boyfriend in the eye.

"Yes please, Maurice," hearing Roy speak formally was so odd.

I couldn't help but cringe a little at his calling me, 'Maurice.'

"So- Mrs Moss?" Roy started and my mother looked over at him with a slanted expression, "What- uh... what-"

Roy looked down at his plate, "What food- did you eat... this week?"

Even I, Maurice Moss, had to hold myself back from facepalming. Neither of us had any people skills.

My mother rolled her eyes, "Okay, this is ridiculous. So I walked in on you two... Uh, what do gay guys call it?"

And my mother just possessed zero subtlety.

"It's the same as straight couples," I answered quietly, barely opening my mouth when speaking.

"Sexy times," my mum seemed triumphant in her conclusion, but it was so much worse than just using the actual word, "It's fine, I've done it. That's how little Maurice got here."

She leaned over the dinner table to pinch my cheek and I swatted away her hand.

"Well, that's my appetite gone," Roy dropped his knife and fork and put his hands up, in an attempt to lighten the mood.

Thought I believe none of us had an incredibly large appetite to begin with.

I nodded knowingly and stood up, "Agreed. We'll help you clean up dinner."

Roy stood up after me and my mum huffed a little at her failed attempt to speak about intercourse with her son before walking off.

"I'm sorry your plan was ruined... dreadfully," Roy whispered in my ear.

"I'm sorry too," I gave my boyfriend a kiss on the cheek and followed my mum to the kitchen.

_-_

_I_ _stood_ _in the doorway of my room,_ _admiring_ _my hard work. My mother_ _wasn't_ _scheduled to get_ _back_ _from work until 5pm, and_ _I_ _was all ready for Roy to come_ _over_ _._

_A trail of flower petals lead from the front door of my house to my bedroom. On my bed, a heart cushion sat atop satin pillows. A pink duvet was neatly tucked into my_ _bed frame_ _, and one, unscented, candle sat on my desk. (One was_ _already_ _enough_ _of a fire hazard, and the scented kind made me uncomfortable.)_

 _A knock at_ _the_ _door sounded_ _through_ _the house, and_ _I_ _quickly_ _picked up the_ _bouquet_ _of flowers I had_ _bought_ _Roy for the_ _occasion_ _before running_ _to_ _the door_ _and_ _opening_ _it_ _._

 _Roy_ _smiled_ _as he realised the flowers. I handed them to_ _him_ _and watched as his cheeks grew brighter. I_ _couldn't_ _help_ _but let a grossly wide grin_ _spread_ _across my face._

_I took the_ _hand_ _of Roy's that_ _wasn't_ _holding onto a_ _bouquet_ _and lead him into my bedroom via the petals._

_Once in my room,_ _I_ _saw_ _Roy's_ _face_ _change_ _from anticipation to surprise (presumably because there was a candle in_ _my_ _room), to an emotion_ _I_ _wasn't_ _quite_ _sure of._

 _"_ _You're_ _such a bottom," he turned to me and chuckled_ _slightly_ _, before_ _throwing_ _his bouquet to the_ _side_ _, slamming_ _the_ _door and pushing me onto the bed._  
  
 _After an undetermined_ _amount_ _of time dedicated to mashing our tongues together,_ _I_ _could_ _tell that_ _Roy_ _and_ _I_ _were both 'ready'._

 _I flipped our positions and began to unbuckle_ _Roy's_ _pants. What_ _happened_ _next was too_ _raunchy_ _for me to speak of, but_ _I'll_ _just_ _say it involved my mouth and some genitals._

 _However_ _, it seemed as_ _though_ _Roy_ _and_ _I_ _both shared the same habit_ _whenever_ _commencing love making - completely losing sight, and hearing, of our surroundings. And for the_ _second_ _time, my mother_ _walked_ _in on_ _something_ _incredibly_ _unsightly_ _._ _However_ _,_ _this_ _time, it appeared worse._

 _As_ _I_ _opened_ _my eyes and_ _caught_ _sight of my mum,_ _I_ _immediately screamed. This then caused her to scream._

 _In all of the chaos,_ _I_ _somehow forgot that there was '_ _something_ _' in my mouth, and unknowingly uh... bit down? This,_ _obviously_ _, caused Roy to scream. Which_ _meant_ _I_ _took my mouth off of_ _him_ _, leaving his full genitals exposed to my_ _mother's_ _eyes. She quickly held a hand_ _up_ _to_ _cover_ _her, no_ _longer_ _innocent, eyes_ _and_ _ran out of the room._

 _I_ _don't_ _think_ _I_ _have_ _ever_ _been through_ _anything_ _quite_ _as humiliating as what went on that day, and I sincerely hope I never will again._

-

That night before leaving, Roy informed me that I should visit his apartment at the same time the next day. And it was then, in fact, the same time the next day.

Roy's apartment was close enough that I could walk. I would have skipped if I had anticipated something good. But after the day before, I entirely expected to be broken up with. And I could not blame him for that. I spent the majority of the walk scolding myself.

However, when I approached the door, all I was met with was Roy saying, "Keep your shoes on."

I realised why as I looked down and spotted a trail of legos leading to his room. I looked back up at, seemingly still my boyfriend, with a raised eyebrow.

"Yeah, I didn't really think the Lego through," he closed the door behind me and awkwardly handed me a bouquet of stems with dice attached to the ends.

"Dice flowers!" I laughed and admired my gift.

Roy then took my hand and lead me over his hand-made path of legos to his room. The only thing illuminating my boyfriend's bedroom was a Darth-Vader-head lamp. As I looked across the room, I noticed Call Of Duty bedsheets and a pillow that looked like a guitar hero controller. I couldn't help but laugh a little. The entire gesture was so ridiculous, but so perfect for Roy and I's relationship.

Roy placed his hands gently on my shoulders, "I believe that the reason your plan didn't end well, is because it's movie romance, which is fine I guess. But it's not us romance. This is our kind of romance."

"Oh, just throw me on the flippin' bed already!"


End file.
